Fight with someone

today and yesterday i receive msg from him.. and he leave me many miss call.... 

actually i forgot i have BF.. because i was set to my mind i'm FOREVER ALONE' so like usual, i will leave my phone far away from me because i knw  nobody will call me.. FOREVER ALONE so like usual, when i go out with family, my phone at home.. when i open my lappy i only look my facebook and blog.. my shop blog is under maintenance so i'm concentrate to my blog and business..actually girl like me not suitable have BF.. nobody can stay with me.. ..     and now he is misunderstand with me.. what i can do???

... and i dont know what going on with me..

I'm also not understand with my self....

i like him, and he is good for me.. But, there are something stop me... 

i cant proceed with him.. i dont mean to hurt anyone but my mind is changed.. 

2 weeks soon is ramadhan.. This is my opportunity to get something in this ramadhan.. and i dont want anything stop me.... If i have BF its will disturb my target for this Ramadhan...

Ya Allah. please help me made right decision..!

if he is not made for me , please make him changed his mind toward me..
just knw, i'm google about 'kawin dengan tentera'' oh god, its not like in my dream their story. OMG!

i think life as forever alone more fun than in relationship.. seriously. just in relationship someone is care about you, and forever alone nobody care  T_T...

......

But, i think i'm not suitable to be someone girlfriend.. why?
i'm so selfish, When i have BF i want him to understand me, and say love me everyday..., and i'm not romantic..

but if my husband is different.. and he is special one... i will do everything for him.. i can be romantic. euuuu.. sorry, i'm over again. hihihihi